Random Thought: What I Look for in a Man

before you walk along side someone else, learn to walk alone and be ok with it.

I love this quote

What I look for in a man? To be honest, although I'm in my 30s, I'm not searching. If I find love on my way to making all my dreams come true, it would be great but if I don't, life will still be beautiful. This view is extremely different from the one I had while I was in High School or College. Back then, I was so obsessed with being liked or being in relationship, then Law School happened and I lived more and realized that those things  were not important. Life was not meant to be lived for a man or a partner; life is still beautiful regardless of one's marital status. We were born alone and we will die alone. That's life. Everything and everyone that suppose to be in your life will be in it. Don't look for love, beg for love or chase after love. Live your life with love and the rest will matter.

Car Selfie

 I'm well aware that everything that I want in a partner are the things that I must be but here are  some things off the list of what I look for in a man.

•  He must be a Christian and tries to live out his faith each day. I'm not the most devout or perfect Christian in this world but I do my best each day and with each opportunity I'm given to show Christ's love to others. The man I date or fall in love with, must love and fear Jesus Christ and believe in Him as his Lord and Savior. My faith is non-negotiable. I believe in Jesus Christ, the Holy Bible as His word, the power of prayer and fellowship with other believers. Jesus Christ is the center of my existence and I want Jesus Christ to be the center of any relationship I'm in.
• He must love and get along with his family especially his mom. I'm well aware that families are complex and sometimes it's best to love your family from a distance. Also, not everyone have a family. But your family can be someone you are not biologically related to; if you love them and get along with them and treat them with respect, that's fine. I have a big family. I don't see nor talk to everyone every day but there's genuine love there and I respect all of them. Plus, I get along with my mom and anyone who is involve with me have to get along with her. She is a part of me.
• He must have a good moral character. A man who has integrity, courage, and he is honest and loyal, he carry himself with honor and treat others with respect. I like honorable men who have good moral compass.
• He must be ambitious. I have a lot of goals and dreams that I want to accomplish now and in the future, and each day I try to do things that helps me accomplish those goals and dreams. The man I end up with must be ambitious. He must be inspired to do something and work towards it. We all have a purpose in this world, and he must walk towards his.
• He must be decisive. I'm a demanding person and if someone doesn't speak up, I may overrun them with my decisions. I want a man who can stand up for himself, speak up and make decisions and not let me take control of everything because I can and will do so.

my first hiking experience

• He must have an open mind.  I'm open minded-ish. Meaning that there are certain things I will not listen/tolerate or be willing to listen to but there are things that I will listen to/be willing to listen/tolerate. The man that I end up with must understand that there are many different viewpoint, lifestyle, culture, tradition and custom, and not everyone will look at things the same way. Common sense and morality are not the same everywhere. Also, I like to try new food and my partner will have to be able to go to different ethnic restaurant and try their cuisine.
• He must be educated either through formal SCHOOLING or LIFE EXPERIENCE. I got educated through formal schooling meaning I went to school and got my diplomas. However, I have met many people who had never been to school but through life experiences have gained their education and are some of the most smartest and successful people I know. Also, depending on where/which country someone is raised in, their education will be different. For example, I have met people who went to some of the best schools in the U.S and yet they did not know that Africa was a CONTINENT, not a country!
• He must love himself. I honestly believe that in order to love others, one must love themselves first.
• He must be able to carry a conversation. I like talking. I can talk forever but I love having conversation with people. Discussion. Interaction. The man I'm with must be able to communicate and carry out a conversation.
• He must be a hard worker. I'm a hard worker. I was raised by a hard worker. I strongly believe in working hard for everything in life.
• He must love to travel. There are about 100 countries that I want to visit; I will visit them all with or without a companion but it would be nice to have someone to travel with.
• He must have non-negotiables. I believe in having certain things that are non-negotiable. For me, my family, my faith and my body are non-negotiable. The man I'm with must have his own boundaries; things he will not compromise on.

me on Single Awareness Day (Valentine Day) 

• He must be financially responsible. I had to learn the hard way the importance of being financially responsible and I don't want someone who is not responsible with his money.
• He must have his own life SEPARATE from mine. I don't want my partner to make me his  whole world. I want him to have his own friends, hobbies, and passions that are separate from mine. I want to be a part of his life NOT his entire life.
• He must be physical active. I love being physically active. I like to run, work out and go hiking. I want to do those things with my partner.
• I must find him physically attractive. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder thus, I have find the one I'm with attractive even if he is not everyone cup of tea.
• He must be chivalrous. I don't believe that chivalry is dead. I like guys who acts like gentleman. 

me on my 31st birthday

  

~xoxo